Saturday, September 17, 2011
I just came back from the hospital. I've been going a lot since popo has been warded. and thank god i found a quicker route home, if not i would be spending a bomb on cab... and its not really wise since i failed my TP AGAIN........................... okay. thats beside the point. i've already gotten over it and i shan't go back again.
anyway, when i went down today after class (thanx to bao for sending me direct to Newton MRT) for her dinner. I realised the bed next to her has lots of commotion. Although the curtains are pulled, covering the patient from sight, i could still hear the doctor calling out to her to open her eyes, a few other doctors/professionals giving instructions to nurses to fill this and to give that. Shortly after, one of the nurse told us that all visitors have to leave the ward and we had to wait outside. My guess was that the patient was in critical condition and they are trying their best to save her. As i walked out towards the main lobby, i saw a few of her family members i recognised outside. They were walking hurriedly, one of the lady was dapping tissues to her eyes and they were talking in urgent tones. I went out to read my book since i'm not allowed in at the moment. Then another lady i recognised, was calling frantically, speaking in grave tone to her family members, i'm guessing. She repeated her sentence over and over to different people saying, "doctor said that mum's heartbeat is inconsistent, see whether you want to come down or not".
I wasn't exactly eavesdropping but because the lobby was so quiet, i could hear every single word she said. I decided to leave her some privacy and put my headphones on. Then, i saw Ah yew and family coming out of the lift. I told them that we are not allowed in until the "rescue process" was done. As time went by, I was worried that dinner would be served for popo so i kept going back to the ward to check. Finally we are able to go in. Passing them again, i head the lady saying on the phone "just tell them its critical condition, and they will allow you up".
I guess its time then. What will happen from here onwards? During my frequent visits to the ward, i saw a number of consistent visitors. These are the ones who, should i say, are more fillal or have the time to visit her. Those who didn't, would just come to see her the last time. Why do i feel, that this scene, is so familiar everywhere?? There's bound to be a less fillal, a can't be bothered, a more fillal, a constantly worrying one? Why does life have to be so realistic? Why does a mother, have to grow through all this shit of bringing up her kids, and in the end, have to face an empty bed 24 hours a day, 7 days a week till she passes on?? Okay, since its sickness, fair enough. She can't be as healthy as before, as active as before and unable to behave like a normal person. Its unfair for me to judge her children by saying that they did not do their parts cuz i did not see everything that has happened. She also does not know much cuz she's already senile. So how then, does one fufil a child's responsibility? I hate it even more, when a mother favours this particular kid more, and this kid, just disappoints time and time again.
guess i'm in no position to judge still...
OKAY! on a lighter note, i've got back my assignemt marks. and i'm satisfied!!!!! yipee!!!!!! =)
Introduction to Social Science
TMA01 - 65%
TMA02 - 69%
The Social Self
TMA01 - 65%
TMA02 - 68%
although all only B, but stilll.. its my first attempt and my hard work paid ofF!!! All the late nights and struggling............. PHEW.
September has flown past its middle mark and its less than 2 months TWO MONTHS!!!! to exams. wtf?!!!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and i'm flying to cambodia in less than a month! and then its my birthday.....................................
okay. loads of stuff to do.. gotta FLY!!! ~~~~~~
7:05 PM
